Words, Weights, Whatever

Tuesday, November 19, 2002

> NIGHT CLASSES FOR MEN - SIGN UP NOW
>
> Classes for Men at our Local Learning Center for Adults.
> Note: Due to the complexity and difficulty level of their
contents, each
> course will accept a maximum of 8 participants each.
>
> TOPIC 1 -
> How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Trays. Step by step, with slide
> presentations.
>
> TOPIC 2 -
> The Toilet Paper Roll: Do They Grow on the Holders? Round
table
> discussion.
>
> TOPIC 3 -
> Is it Possible to Urinate Using the Technique of Lifting the
Seat Up and
> Avoiding the Floors/Walls and Nearby Bathtub? Group practice.
>
> TOPIC 4 -
> Fundamental Differences Between the Laundry Hamper and the
Floor.
> Pictures and explanatory graphics.
>
> TOPIC 5 -
> The After-Dinner Dishes and Silverware: Can They Levitate and
Fly into
> the Kitchen Sink? Examples on video.
>
> TOPIC 6 -
> Loss of Identity: Losing the Remote to Your Significant Other.
Helpline
> support and support groups.
>
> TOPIC 7 -
> Learning How to Find Things, Starting With Looking in the
Right Place
> Instead of Turning the House Upside Down While Screaming. Open
forum.
>
> TOPIC 8 -
> Health Watch: Bringing Her Flowers is NOT Harmful to Your
Health.
> Graphics and audio tape.
>
> TOPIC 9 -
> Real Men Ask for Directions When Lost. Real life testimonials.
>
> TOPIC 10 -
> Is It Genetically Impossible to Sit Quietly as She Parallel
Parks?
> Driving simulation.
>
> TOPIC 11 -
> Learning to Live: Base Differences Between Mother and Wife.
On-line
> class and role playing.
>
> TOPIC 12 -
> How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion. Relaxation exercises,
> meditation, and breathing techniques.
>
> TOPIC 13 -
> How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy: Remembering Birthdays,
Anniversaries,
> Other Important Dates, and Calling When You're Going to Be
Late.
> Cerebral shock therapy sessions and full lobotomies offered.

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