Words, Weights, Whatever

Thursday, October 07, 2004

"Come together, right now, over me"

The remodeling of our house continued last night. Our floor contractor came over to take measurements of the master and guest bathrooms in anticipation of the work we want done in both. He brought a new staircase contractor to take measurements and specifics of our staircase.
The effect this project on us has struck me almost curious. Overall, this endevour been harmonious. We've heard plenty of couples whose relationships strain at such projects and I'll admit we've had a few moments. It doesn't help R. works nearly an hour and a half away from home. This draws out the process as we can't simply get together during the weekdays and drive over to the nearest store to look at fixtures. And not all such stores are open the entire weekend, either.

I believe the reasons are quite simple. R.'s family has done such remodeling of their homes in the past. We also have very similar tastes, agreeing almost immediately on what I call a "Structure" color scheme.

I acquiece a lot to R.'s suggestions. This is not due to some battle of wills between the two of us, but I simply acknowledge R.'s better eye in the overall scheme, the patterns, and the details. I still cringe at the sight of some of downstairs bookcases, cases I had built with haste in mind, not detail. The misplaced backing, the bowing shelves, all which would not have happened if I had paid more attention.

Bookcases, though, are not human lives. Every day R. continues to amaze me about patients' illnesses and how one test or symptom--coupled with experience and knowledge--changes a diagnosis. (And it continually pains both of us how many patients continually self-diagnosis themselves based on hearsay, urban myth, books, and the Internet. There is a reason for those blood tests, folks.)

But I digress.

The remodeling is definitely a joint effort. I keep watch over our budget. R. sometimes has too many ideas and needs my input. (And, by the by, I will priorities aestethics over funds depending on the options.) And there is definitely one room that will be all mine to remodel: my office.

Finally (and in some ways, the most important), remodeling is a major undertaking even for R.'s shoulders. Thus I give reassurances that everything will be fine, that all this effort is worth it and the designs will be gorgeous. And I do this daily. As the cliche' goes: it's the little things that can make or break a relationship.

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