Words, Weights, Whatever

Thursday, April 28, 2005

***Voted off***

I can't believe how sore I am from Tuesday's workout. But I'm getting a chest again. Yeah!

I'm on Blogrolling. Yesterday, after posting in my blog, I updated (pinged) Words, Weights, Whatever, on the service and checked to see if the update was showing up on other blogs linked to WWW. To do so, I clicked on one of the blogs I regularly read.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered I was no longer on that blog's Blogrolling list. This can't be, I thought as I did a Search on the site. But unfortunately it was true: I had been removed from that blogger's reads.

I experienced a gamut of emotions as I returned to WWW, primarily sadness. What had I done to piss them off enough to remove me? Or, worse, I thought, had I become too boring for them to read. Regardless of the reason, I had to quickly steel myself for my next action: removing their blog from my Blogrolling list.

A few weeks ago I decided to start cleaning up my To Read blogs. My primary criteria was only to list those sites who had a link to my own blog. I made a few exceptions (i.e., Weasels in my Shorts) but that's usually because the blogger has multiple blogs. Other reasons for including/excluding a blog are the very popular updates or, more specifically, the bloggers were not updating their websites on a fairly regular basis.

This blogger's site had been a regular read of mine since last year. I always enjoyed their posts and had noted, from comments left and other means, they visited my own blog and (hopefully) enjoyed my entries as well. But it's obvious they've decided to remove WWW from their reads and I have to respect their decision: I've made similar actions to other blogs in the past myself.

Yes, I could make another exception and keep this blogger's website on my blogroll. There are no obligation, no ties, for either of us to keep each other's site on our own blog. But I made my decision for a reason and don't see any need to change it. At the very least it will help me focus more on those bloggers who are interested in WWW to keep it as one of their links.

But parting, as the cliche' goes, is such sweet sorrow....

(Image found on the Internet and all rights belong to its owner.)

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Work has been...sufficiently calm...that I worked on some ideas in my head. (Off company time like lunch, of course.)

I hit the gym for the first time in two week. Yikes! The instructor had a rough day with her staff and decided to let out her frustration on us poor participants. NOT. But she had new music, new routines, and a filled glass. And I and several others egged her on with growls, yips, and yowls in our enjoyment with the routine. A fun but exhaustive regimen.

Then I made the mistake of taking her weight-training class afterwards.

Huh. Let's just say I'm sore right now.

(Image found on the Internet and all rights belong to its owners.)

On Sunday, while walking down Santa Monica Boulevard to our fav eatery for a little din-din and intimacy, I heard the pattering of running feet behind me and turned. It was S, one of my friend's JSE's ex's. After greeting each other ("Hey! How's it going?" "Okay. Uh, I forgot your name."), he floored The Spouse and I with the question, "so, are you still together?"

Lately, as one of my few reading entertainments (besides Sellevision and Secret Atlas) has been Bechel's Dykes To Watch Out For, a series of cartoons about Mo and her entourage of family, friends, and ex's. LOTS of ex's not only for the Mo but for virtually every character (with the possible exception of Alberta...er...Jazeea (sp?)) in the strip. I thought of those characters after chatting with S. who apparently still missed JSE despite the decade after their breakup.

It's hard to sustain a long-term relationship (LTR) in this day and age. I once read that the divorce rate was as high as 50% for couples after a year of marriage (higher, of course, if you're in the entertainment industry.) It's worse, though, for those who live in alternative lifestyles (i.e., same-sex, triads, open relationships, "swingers", etc.) having to rely more on the participants own willingness to keep the primary relationship together since there's little, if any (or opposing) public support. The latter can include one's own community as it continues to struggle to define what is a relationships. The modern relationship--where two folks get together because of love--is a relatively new invention with the "traditional" one to be arranged marriages. One of my aunts, for example, was in an arranged marriage with my mom just at the cusp of having been in one. (The tradition was dying in her country by the time she reached dating age.)

After reassuring S. that, yes, R. and I were still together and going strong into our twelth year, we parted ways after catching up on our lives. We talked a bit about JSE and S. then noted how many ex's both had after the two had split and possibly why each couple had broken up (and, no, I won't be discussing them in my blog. This is a public forum!)

R. and I hope for the best for any two (or more. I know a few triads and open relationships.) who are just starting out together and it breaks our hearts when they split. What we've learned from our own relationships is that it takes all parties involved to make it work; one person cannot sustain a happy couplehood (or group) unless they're on drugs (remember the stereotypical pill-popping housewife of the fifties and sixties?). This applies even when the social system supports their marriage. Fortunately, R. and I have fallen into a peer group where not our relationship is supported but, in many ways, expected. None of our peers would even consider asking if we were still together.

So here's some advice we've learned after all these years: it really doesn't matter if the toilet paper comes from the bottom of the roll or the top.

Monday, April 25, 2005

***Weekend Words***

No writing and barely any reading due to the Festival of Books.

Walking around the UCLA campus all day is enough exercise for the weekend. Ugh.

There was no rest for the wicked as we woke early to head out for the Festival of Books. We hit traffic scant miles from the site, which was another sign from a perverse universe. Fortunately, The Spouse was driving and, knowing the territory, weaved us onto the campus ten minutes later than our deadline. I couldn't believe, though, the number of people in the Hillerman line waiting for sigs. They easily must have arrived at 0900 for his 1100 signing.

(Image found on the Internet and all rights belong to its owners.)

The rest of Saturday was, to be blunt, work as we secured more signings. (Exception: Reeves-Stevens.) Fortunately the weather continued to be cool. And while we were saddened the Festival was held on a major holiday (Passover), it considerably culled the crowds to barely tolerable. But both of us noted how rude people have become, shoving pass us with barely a glance.

We dined that evening at a wonderful Italian restaurant in Westwood. Note to self: do not stuff one's belly on a cold night where one's prone to hiccups.

Sunday we woke later but made it with plenty of time to Ms Clark's signing. We secured a few more autographs but now enjoyed ourselves checking out the booths. I didn't find anything of interest this time, though. Closed the evening dining at one of our favs in West Hollywood. Overall, a busy weekend.

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