Too much whine
I reviewed my latest entries and am appalled at the lack of good stuff. Must be the empty stomach. Here's some more 'positive' news:
Whatever
Giant black hole caught devouring star
Saturday, February 21, 2004
Why?
Whatever
I know at least three dysfunctional relationships where the dissatisfied partner continues to live with their partner. One, a well-off computer programmer, told me their relationship ended years ago and now they're just "friends". Yet he won't date anyone else or bring them home while the "friend" is there. By the by, the friend constantly gives unwanted advice; asks for money (which my friend gives); has total opposite viewpoints to my friend's worldview; can't keep a job (constantly quits); and--at one point--actually got married for legal status purposes (asking my friend, of course, for funds to support the fictional marriage.) My friend swears there's no sex, either.
Another friend has a roommate whom he had 'physical intimacy' with. Read had. Yet all my friend complains about is how clinging the roommate is, at one point even stalking my friend in his own condo! Yikes! Now my friend has a SO across the world that everyone knows about.
In this case, I understand the issue. M.'s scared of dying alone. But is fear that strong that people are willing to shack up with someone totally opposite? Apparently so.
I don't fully understand the last relationship. This friend's relationship started off well but soured after his partner lost a job. Now there are a lot of issues in this one: lack of physical intimacy; communication; finances (my friend pays pretty much for everything in this relationship); etc., which I've listened in detail. I don't understand why they're still living under the same roof. Is it truly money? Companionship? Being in a rut? Cowardice? Manipulation?
Music of nature
WWW
When I'm working on my desktop at home, I like to listen to music. For years I've had probs opening the CD-ROM player on my machine; I have manually pull the tray out to load a disk.
Today the player is proving to be exceptionally stubborn. After the fifth try, I gave up. I then heard a few birds chirping outside my window. A lawn being mowed. A car passing by or starting up. More birds. As I paused my hands over my ergonomically-correct keyboard, I thought, "there's my music."
Yesterday stuff
Little bit about yesterday
Words
Started work on background stuff for my current WIP but got distracted by family. Hey, I know my priorities!
Resume work today.
Weights
Interesting. Though I brought in donuts to work, I only ate two. That's a record for me.
Whatever
Work was quite busy. And I'm definitely getting more competent which is a mixed blessing. That means more stuff I can handle on my own. Sigh.
Lunch out. That's it. When I order a caesar salad, dressing is on the side! I think the salad was roughly half and half: half veggies, half dressing. Ugh.
Is it me, or are the servers over at Romano's really cute? J. served me yesterday (bad wording there!) and looked exceptionally fine. Sigh. It's the just the attractiveness of youth.
Moving on...
An ex-co-worker whom I maintained contact after we were let go from our jobs is beginning to really irritate me. While I'm not opposed to his religious and political views--which are total opposite of mine--I am peeved that he's a parrot: he constantly quotes the bible or some article from the popular media to support his viewpoint. It's obvious he's not thinking about what he's saying and I don't like people who don't think. And this type of (lack of) thinking--plus the fact he hasn't done anything to move his life forward--makes me think* it's time for me to sever this relationship.
My sibling called that evening, seeking advice on how to handle our mother. Specifically, J.'s preggie and is concerned about our mom's wishes during the birth. I offered my perspective and it seemed to calm her.
R.'s sick. Cold. Damn.
*Hmmm. How many times did I use the word 'think' in this paragraph?
Friday, February 20, 2004
The Governator's view on the same-sex marriage controversy
Whatever
Thanks, Alan!
Judge combines same-sex marriage cases
The governor's opinion is further down the article.
STATEMENT BY GOV. SCHWARZENEGGER ON SAME-SEX MARRIAGE
I'm not really surprised.
2004 DW
Whatever
Cool. I bet those who follow horoscopes, astrology, and the likes are either elated, horrified, or confused...
Largest Solar System body spotted since Pluto
Thursday, February 19, 2004
It's the little things...
Whatever
Due to blogs I intermittently follow and a few of my friends relationships, I've been more...aware...of my own relationship recently.
My spouse has had it bad at work the past couple of weeks. A rough on-call schedule, the drive, and lack of sleep have been taking their toll. But the worse have been the patients: rude, rude, RUDE. The number of able-bodied folks trying to get on disability is staggering: one patient, for example, keeps coming in for chronic muscle pain (caused by a bad mother-daughter relationship over 30 years ago) but refuses to take any meds except medically-approved marijuana and morphine. When R. gently tries to explain she doesn't qualify and there are other meds available, the patient screams, insulting my spouse's training ("all doctors are f^%#!@#$"), the clinic ("the ***** medical group are f^%#!@#$), and even other patients as she storms out ("you're all f^%#!@#$ and your stupid mother-f^%#!@#$&^%* for seeing these f^%#!@#$$#@! pieces of s@!# doctors!)
Not that it makes much of a difference, but the patient is in her mid-to-late forties.
Getting back to the point.
R. was venting about the patients and lack of sleep. Once I would have tried to come up with solutions. This time I listened and provided comforting words (e.g., I'm sorry to hear that. People are stupid. Take a deep breath. Regular people are selfish, narrow-minded, and utterly insane. Yes, let's take a vacation and find a place where people aren't total sh%#...)
Will these words solve the prob? No. We both know that and we know the courses of action to take if we really believe it's bad. I'm more than willing for R. to quit and for us to take a step down economically. But we both decided to stick this issue out; it's the first viable job in years.
And the problems don't last. Neither do the good times. But a relationship can last.
That's the point of this entry. Most couples can handle the "big" issues and recover from them: divorce, death, etc. But it's the daily trials and tribulations that ultimately test a couple both separately and together. In my opinion (IMO), that's why the first year (and first couple of years) are the true tests regardless if the issues faced during that time are big or small.
Is there a true way to absolutely know if a relationship will make it? Many expert claim there is. I don't know. All I know is that a listening ear and a genuine kiss (with a quick grope) on a daily basis do more than money, furs, or jewelry on so-called special occasions.
Well, except my birthday. :)
Wednesday, February 18, 2004
Rain, rain, keep on coming....
Weights
Diet shot to heck since last night. Had the cheesy shrimp and crab combo for a late night dinner. I'm amazed I didn't suffer stomach cramps last night.
Today I bought the breakfast burrito from the food truck. Ugh. Felt like a solid rock in my stomach all day. I was still amazed I was able to eat a substantial lunch.
Ugh. No wonder I haven't been able to lose weight lately.
Whatever
Rains finally arrived in the late morn. Yeah! We need it. Course, now our traffic probs have worsened. Spouse is totally frazzled from the commute.
Minor blog stuff
Whatever
Added a new link. Inquiring if Blogrolling works with Blogger. It would be nice to see which blogs have been updated.
Tuesday report
Words
Well, I'm keeping up on my journals.
Weights
Good cardio class yesterday. Not too intense but a good workout. And it alleviated greatly the (possible) tendonitis(sp?) in my right arm.
Whatever
Major staff change at work. Five let go. Ouch. And the President says the economy is getting better?
Had a wonderful time chatting with my friends G. and C. over at The Center last night. I'm concerned about both of them, though: the former has relationship issues and the latter has health-related stuff (compounded with a shaky job and recent family stuff.) I don't pray but send positive vibes their way constantly.
Tuesday, February 17, 2004
The rest of Monday
Words
Ack. Best laid plans got wasted by naps and MTV. Actually, make that VH1. Really, it was trying to watch only one Slayers episode.
My bad.
Weights
Originally planned to hit the gym and resume weight-training. Changed my mind and did bills instead (see below). Excuses don't just apply to writing. Then I see one of my co-workers coming back from the gym all toned. We exchanged pleasantries while I'm seething against myself inside. Grrr.
Whatever
Completed most of my ToDo list. Mailed out bills, food shop, and picked up necessary meds. This included the necessary wrist brace. No, I don't need it but I've been feeling the twinges.
Happy dance for me! Now I need to start doing one hundred percent instead of seventy...
Monday, February 16, 2004
Humor
Whatever
Thanks, Patrick!
ANSWERING MACHINE MESSAGES
These are actual answering machine answers recorded and verified by the world famous international institute of answering machine answers.
1. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here, so leave a message.
3. Speak.
4. Hi, Now you say something.
5. Hi, I'm not at home right now, but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
6. Hello. I'm David's answering machine. What are you?
7. (From Japanese friend) He-lo! This is Santo. If you leave message, I call you soon. If you leave "sexy message," I call you sooner!
8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
9. Hello, You are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give charity through their office and do not need their pictures taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.
10. This is not an answering machine. This is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call.
11. Hi. I am probably home. I'm avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
12. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.
13. If you are a burglar, then we're at home cleaning our weapons right now and can't answer the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't home and it is safe to leave us a message.
14. Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right, real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll get back to you.
No sex in SF/F, please.
Whatever
Whoa
Tearing out an offending page and library bans Asimov mag because content offends 13 year old girl...
Research shows being an optimist is bad for you.
Whatever
Las Vegas must hate pessimists...
It's the optimists who are life's losers, claim researchers
You're not in the mood to write? Read this
Write
Good article. Thanks, Gary!
The Invisible Writers
Whatever
This is a rare rant. Leave if you think the medical community is a bunch of rich, snob, elites who spend their days talking about their affairs, having affairs, or planning affairs.
The article above reminds me of some of the patients my spouse encounters. These patients complain how tough their lives are: they're bored at being secretaries; being parents; can't get dates; how horrible their jobs are as producers/actor/models/waiters, etc. My spouse, of course, has to listen to them as they--again--lie about their ailments; lie about taking (or not taking) their meds; ignore medical advice to treat their cancer because their guru knows better; scream why can't the medical community give them life-long disability because they broke a nail; etc.
My spouse drives three hours to work round trip since there are no medical jobs in Orange County. My spouse doesn't get a lunch: that time's spent entering/filling out the gargantuan records for each patient's illness and why they don't want the standard medical treatment but addictive drugs instead (which they always threaten to sue if they don't get.) After closing hours, it's an additional two-three hours to fill out any forms, call patients who refuse to do any follow ups (the number of people scared to hear if they have cancer, etc., and thus avoid early treatment is amazing!), and contact the labs. Then there's an additional two-three hours of work once getting home to go over more records.
Sigh.
Then there's the medical malpractice stuff. I remember an article last year that illustrated the plight of physicians over in Virginia. If a doctor grossed around 120k, their medical malpractice insurance cost nearly $50k neta year. That means that a physician took home around 29k a year. While that may be a lot in Virginia--I don't know--it doesn't sound like a lot to me.
My spouse is a superb physician even when I look objectively. Yet many a time we've thought about job changes. I feel the stress is not worth it and life expectancy is not high for doctors. There's a grim term for survivors: doctor's widows (widowers). It may sound selfish, but I'd rather keep my spouse alive than help many of the bastards who go into the medical office suing for addictive meds because they can't handle their latest divorce (which, of course, was caused by them having any affair but it's not their fault!)
End rant. That was cathartic. Thanks for 'listening'. Now, back to my regular optimistic attitudes towards people...
Sunday, February 15, 2004
All that stuff
Words
Gathered all my current WIP stuff and organized most of them into keynote. Yikes! I can't believe I've written so much stuff in the past. It's going to take me some time to get refamiliar with the details.
WWW so far
Words
Writing between 1500-1800 (minimum) mostly on organizing what I have so far; getting reacquainted with the WIP; and background stuff (i.e., setting, character, etc.)
Weights
Attended a cardio class down in at the South Coast Ballys and lucked out. My favorite instructor was teaching the class and she told me her schedule for the rest of the month (i.e., no classes in February, almost all of March.) Yeah!
Whatever
R.'s on-call and up in the valley until at least Monday night (and maybe until Tuesday depending the the 'fatigue' factor.) We hate when the schedule's like this but there's virtually nothing we can do. Sigh.
Oh! Rest of today's schedule:
1500-1800 (possibly 1900) Write.
Dinner.
2000-2130 Housework.
2131-2230 Start finances for accountant in a couple of weeks.
Read a chapter or two in a book. I'm currently reading Lindholm's Luck of the Wheels.
Sleep.
More blog changes
Whatever
More editing on my links (see sidebar). Hmmm. One day I should discuss my criteria on what gets uploaded and what gets deleted.